Wednesday, October 28, 2009

This conversation through me for a loop a little and feel the need to preserve it.

so he believes its important for a family to be unified under the last name

which I agree with

I asked whats wrong with being unified under the woman's last name or under the joining of both last names

he said that our society traces lineage through fathers last names

so I said then wouldn't the joining of both names be more efficient for that

and he said yes and so I asked his opinion on using both names

and he said makes him seem like less of a man

and I said he should be more secure in his masculinity and be more interested in a relationship being an equal partnership

and he said that he doesnt want a life partner, he wants a wife

so I asked whats the difference

and he said "a life partner is less connected. It's like gays who can't get married get a life partner instead."

I said that I dont understand how being equal members of a relationship makes a woman a life partner rather than a wife

and he just replied that he doesnt know, he hasnt given it enough thought

I asked him to give it the appropriate amount of thought some time, that I'd appreciate it.

He said okay, I thanked him, he said you're welcome.

If you happen to read this. Thoughts?

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

My Over Due Ephiany

Dear My Most Loyal Readers,

I apologize for being so long between posts. Now that I'll have a more consistent schedule I fully expect to update more regularly.

CoverGirl has a new spokesperson, famed talk show host, Ellen Degeneres. As most of you know, I've used CoverGirl foundation, blush, and various other products for most of my adult life. I've been doing a lot of soul searching lately and this new ad campaign has really got me thinking... Ellen is one of the most prominent lesbian celebraties... Ellen is a lesbian, she uses CoverGirl, who's to say that I'm not a lesbian, I mean.. I use CoverGirl too...

Another rather significant CoverGirl spokesperson is Queen Latifa, she's been supporting and promoting CoverGirl ever since I can remember. If there is one person that I associate with CoverGirl more than anyone else, that person is Ms. Latifa. In case you've been leaving under a rock, the Queen finally came out of her loosely locked closet last year...

If such prominent women that wear CoverGirl products can be lesbians, I must be a lesbian too. Right?

Looks like I'll be in for an interesting weekend...

Thanks for reading, Signing Off.

Friday, October 3, 2008

Live to Party or Party to Live?

Are you the type of person that lives in the moment like that Eve 6 song says, "Are you the now or never kind?"

I know a number of guys and gals that are. Or at least live in such away that would lead to that assumption.

I'm not the now or never kind, I'm the "If not now, maybe next time" kind. And I like it that way, maybe I'm an optimist and anticipate next times always existing. I sort of feel as though if next time doesn't exist, oh well, I probably didn't want it all that badly anyway.

(Are we all clear on what it means to be the "If not now, maybe next time" kind? What do you think that phrase implies?)

But hey, if I'm the "If not now, maybe next time" kind and I'm an optimist, is the now or never kind the opposite of me? If we're opposites and I'm an optimist.... them that would make them a pessimist? Or do they not even think enough to be a pessimist, they just think enough to say "yes" and act?

I knew one guy that claimed he had "no regrets"; he said that whatever decision he'd made, even if later he thought the other choice would have been better, he knew that at the time, he thought he was making the right, best choice, thus, no regrets. If this were ECON 2050, we'd "assume" that he was "rational".

But what if... you do make a mistake, you're beating yourself up about it... how long until you finally let yourself go, forgive yourself, if you will?

Or answer this, can you make mistakes and admit to those mistakes, but still have no regrets? Are you sure about that? ....really answer this one, I'm so interested.

Which has the best result?

A number of people claim that it's better to make decisions as though right now is all there is, that what's happening right now is what counts. What do you think?

As G/T kid, they tell you that you think way more than other kids. Thinking about my friends, the G/T kids that come to mind seem as though they'd be thoughtful when it came to decisions for the most part. So would that put them in the "If not now, maybe later" group? And if that is the case, are the brainy kids "If not now, maybe later" and the "less brainy" kids the now or never?

Talk to me people. I want input!

Thursday, August 28, 2008

A Tribute to Examples and the People Who Set Them

On my floor the RA put papers on each door with the name of the people that live inside. For example, our door has two papers taped to it, one with my name, Kelly, and another with my room mates name, Kristin. As far as I can tell, each paper has an inspirational quote at the bottom of it. The quote that accompanies my paper goes as follows:

"Mistakes can often be as good a teacher as success."

Ironic? I thought so.

You know that quote that says something about how some peoples purpose is to be an example to others of what NOT to do? I've always thought how much it sucks to be those people. But when I look at stuff that I've done the only solace I have is to think "Well, at least I know that I never want to do that again", "at least I know that's not what I want for myself", and "at least I'll be able to help other people by advising them against doing what I did".

I always make decisions because I think they'll work out, and then while they're happening or after they happen I think "Man, this might have turned out better if I hadn't done that." Ross used to be bothered by some action I took and I'd say something along the lines of "Okay, I won't do that next time." but then something similar (but not the same) would happen and I'd do the same thing. (I wish I could be more specific, I just can't remember an actual example.) And Ross would say that I'd done it again, and I'd say "It was a different situation, I didn't know it would be wrong in that situation." And Ross would say something relating to how he wishes I didn't always have to make a mistake first, that it'd be nice if sometimes I could just know not to do something.

The truth is that sometimes I do KNOW not to do something and I don't do it, other times I KNOW not to do something but I do it anyway... because its what I want to do, or because I really just want to believe its the right thing, other times I feel that there is reasonable doubt, and then sometimes, I feel pressured to choose wrongly as to not hurt someone else. I'm sure there are scenarios other than this.

I don't know if I've written this before but I once told my camp kids that a pretty reliable way to tell what the right thing to do is, is that the right choice is usually the more difficult one. Not always true, but it definitely can be.

Moral of this post?
Eff decisions not being black and white.

This post rambles a lot... sorry. I was doing a lot of other things while I was trying to write it. I finally gave up.

Thursday, August 7, 2008

Because I hold the Record

I hold the record for crying in the widest variety of places, at least when it comes down to our friends. I would guess, although I dont have hard proof.

Once I believe there was either a postsecret or a response to a post secret that said something about how nice and concerned people are when they see someone distraught in pubic. It true. And it only makes me cry harder.

I couldn't tell you the number of times I've cried just thinking about how nice people are. I'm always impressed when people care enough to show concern. Friends and strangers alike.

Don't think that the times I've cried weren't completely warranted. I'm not usually that sensitive, special circumstances over a span of months. I don't cry like that anymore.

One day I'll go into detail, have shout outs, the whole deal.

Sunday, August 3, 2008

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Only the Best?

Refusing to settle doesn't just mean not marrying a prick. It means refusing to let a pricks presence in your life weigh you down.